Tag Archives: Unconventional

June Cleaver Who?

4 Jun

It seems like everyone has become a professional blogger.  You know how it goes. “This blog is just a platform for me to share my thought-provoking and enlightening experiences”—NOT! My mind works in mysterious ways.  Seriously, sometimes I question the way the synapses synapse to make me think of the things that my brain conjures up.  First let me say, I am a critic of conventional wisdom.  I am the antithesis of June Cleaver.  I will probably offend some but many will fall in love with me. I read parenting books and magazines just to refute the bs they propagate.  My kids eat Kid Cuisine’s, Swedish Fish and watch well over the recommended dose of TV; yet my 6-year-old was the smartest in her class with benchmarks off the charts and my twins are not your average toddlers  (their genius seriously scares me—more about that in later posts).

Think of me as that little nuisance on your shoulder, but are too ashamed/embarrassed/reserved to acknowledge (aloud).  I have no filter and I don’t proclaim to know it all.  I once thought an Atari was a musical instrument and often mistake a screwdriver with a monkey wrench.  But here’s what I do know:  I am a wife to a man who was created just for me.  Seriously he just gets me, no questions asked.  Our relationship just works.  And I am the mother of three of the most adorable little divas-in-trainings, but I’m not afraid to admit they’re bad very adventurous! They’re smart, rambunctious and keep me on my toes.  The four of them are the reasons why Bitchin’ is my first language.

It’s funny because they know when I’m about to get started–even the 20-month-olds.  My nose flares, I pop my gum , huff and puff.  My already soprano voice raises an octave and my Jersey accent mysteriously returns.  Then all of a sudden I speak like a mob boss and the commands begin to spew and everyone scatters.  Well,  scatter is an exaggeration, but they do look at me as if I’m some crazy, possessed person from a Yo Gabba Gabba episode gone bad.  Sometimes my tactics work, and most times it doesn’t.  But I’m no longer in denial.  I bitch, nag and complain and surprisingly, everything stays the same.  Rule of Life #1208 Bitchin’ Ain’t Easy, but look good while doing it.

Photos Courtesy of HWillMama