Confessions of a Not-So-Perfect Mom

8 Jul

On a number of occasions, I’ve given sweets tylenol pm when she didn’t have a fever but I needed her to get to sleep–sooner rather than later.

My girls think mimosa means “mom juice”.

During my all-day lifetime movie marathons, I give the kids cereal, capri suns, fruit roll ups and crayons to keep them from bothering me.

I taught my 6-year-old how to change diapers, fill sippy cups and warm food in the microwave so I can sleep in on the weekends.

I catch up on “business” while the kids are running wild and destroying the house.  When I say business that really means I’m on Twitter.

I play Yo Gabba Gabba to distract the kids when the hubs in I are in the bedroom having sex.

On a few occasions, I’ve used sweets allowance money to order pizza.

Twice, I didn’t send sweets to school because she had a midday hair appointment.

I’ve parked in handicap parking not because I’m disabled but because I didn’t feel like carrying two car seats from the back of the parking lot.

I tell businesses that my 4ft 2in 6-year-old is actually 3 so she can be admitted for free.

I substitute Juicy Juice and Pediasure for actual fruit and vegetable consumption.

I still have, but never paid for sweets school pictures from last year.

I enjoy throwing caution to the wind and making up my own parenting rules as I go along.  Who’s nominating me for the mother of the year award this year?

Rule of Life #412 Being a perfect mom is so overrated.  Bad is the new good.

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5 Responses to “Confessions of a Not-So-Perfect Mom”

  1. Ashbell July 9, 2010 at 2:08 pm #

    LOL omg I love this post girl…”I tell businesses that my 4ft 2in 6-year-old is actually 3 so she can be admitted for free.” —You don’t know how many times my parents made me lie about my age at Ryans buffet to get that kid discount back in 96-97..hahahaha you so u sound like a NORMAL mother to me! =)

  2. miniskirtmama July 9, 2010 at 10:16 pm #

    Good think you’ve taught sweetness to play along. Most kids talk to much – they want you to know their real age. LOL! When I first read your post…I thought Yo Gabba Gabba was used for you & the hubs time in the bathroom. I was like look at them pulling a Byrd & Lem. LOL!

  3. Erin July 12, 2010 at 12:15 am #

    LOL !! I agree with the comment above, you sound like a normal momma who’s just trying to stay sane and get through the day just like the rest of us. Yo Gabba Gabba and many other shows on Noggin are the reason I’m able to take a shower, check my email..etc. I also once let my son who was 18 months at the time empty a desk drawer so that I could play on facebook.

  4. Lindsay O'Quinn July 12, 2010 at 1:35 am #

    THATS WHAT IM TALKIN ABOUT!

    yay you!

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  1. Balance…where art thou? | Notorious S.H.E. - July 7, 2011

    […] women is to be supermom, I couldn't be further from mommy perfection ( I've previously blogged about this too). […]

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