Sex and the Busy Mom

23 Jun

I recently read a poll about how seldom moms have sex.  It’s funny because of all the wisdom and suggestions offered at my baby shower I don’t remember anyone telling me about this devious little secret (the next shower I attend, I’m spilling the beans)!  The poll stated moms want to have sex as often as dad, but it often gets pushed aside and forgotten about–pretty depressing, right?  Sadly, I can attest to having a fleeting libido.  But I’m happy to report, my mojo is on a comeback tour.

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I was so excited when a couple of my friends told me about the “peak” women experience in their late 20’s into their 30’s. My entire 20’s have been dedicated to being a mom and wife. Which is very important but sometimes we miss out on self and forget about the things that once stimulated our nipples minds and bodies.  I’ll be the first to admit, kids will eff up your sex life.  Personally, I felt abandoned by my libido. Going from multiple times a day to being able to count on one hand how many times in one week had me distraught.  I came to gripes with myself when I sat down and wrote my once rambuctious mojo a letter:

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Dear Mo,

I know things haven’t been the same between us lately. I remember when it was all about the ambiance: 112 in the cd player, candles lit, sexy lingerie. Now it’s just “Are we gonna do this or not?”.  Where did we go wrong?  Is it my muffin top?  My thunder thighs?  You know I’ve been working on that for about 6 years now.  Was it the hair cut?  I know you felt like a sex kitten with long hair–I can get a wig!  Was it the lactating boobs?  Hey I had mouths to feed but we’re over that now.  I just want you to come back to me.  As desperate as I sound we really miss you!

Love,

Your former bff

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I recently had a party with dildos, vibrating panties and oils (oh my).  It was fun and entertaining but it reminded me of how important being uninhibited really is.  And how essential it is to have one-on-one time with the hubs–sans the kids!   Most men take it personally when they experience a plunge in their sex life.  In my experience, it wasn’t about him.  It was about the added responsibilities of keeping up with the kids, the house, the pets, the job.  I think I got my first grey hair 4 years ago, yikes I was only twenty–er–nevermind.  So fellas, if you want to get her in the mood try washing dishes, folding clothes, cooking dinner.  Keep the kids out of the bathroom while mom is in the shower.  Tell her to go out with the girls and take a few shots of grey goose let her hair down!   And you’ll see how fast the lingerie comes out of the closet!

Rule of Life #1104 Bitchin’ aint easy and neither is gettin’ your freak on with a house full of kids!

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Some interesting reads:

The Magic Pill That Makes Oral Sex Taste Better

7 Sex Moves to Try in Bed Before You Pop the Female Viagra

My Husband And I Made a Sex Contract

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2 Responses to “Sex and the Busy Mom”

  1. Shay mama June 24, 2010 at 7:18 am #

    Damn damn damn you have NO idea how much I feel u.. @ the end of the day after all the BULLSHIT I just dont feel like it… lmao… IT IS WHAT IT IS… LUV U AONYA PONYA

  2. Ashbell June 25, 2010 at 2:19 pm #

    Give this woman a talk show because this blog is AMAZING!! love it!

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